21 & Over: Especially for those with Children

There are many young ladies out here who are making bad choices, all in the name of 'wanting to be loved'.  It needs to be said that NO ONE will love you if you DO NOT first love yourself! In order to begin the process of accepting YOU, loving YOU there must be an inventory check; you must examine YOU and be honest with yourself about the necessary changes YOU need to make in order to begin seeing change in your life. It is time to grow up...time to move in the direction of self consideration, self acceptance, self respect, and self growth!

So, you talk about wanting to find that 'special' guy.
You complain about being alone...you often ask why.

You find yourself attracting opposite of what you seek.
Wondering if this is how things are always going to be.

Well, ladies let me school you on a few things.
I’ve been where you are…both failing in ‘love’ and temporary flings.

You only attract who YOU ARE; cliché…no, not at all.
Opposites DON’T attract; a false reality that often causes one to fall;

Not for the good dude who has all that you deeply desire,
But for the other dude who will only repeat what the others did prior.

Can YOU be the reason why your relationships either don’t happen or fail?
Have you taken a good look at YOU inside and out; have you examined your trail?

Let’s take a look at some of the more common things that you are blind to.
Yes, blind… confident that you’re ‘good’ in everything that you do.

How do you look when you step out? Clothes too tight, dress too short, wearing a transparent shirt?
Let’s be real…a good dude might peep you? But in reality you no more than a flirt!

Where you hangin’ out during your free time? You clubbin’, drinkin’, chillin’ with ya click?
No good dudes want a lady with mixed up priorities; 21 and older….time to grow up and get wit it!

How is your attitude? Loud? Rude? Do you want more than you are willing to give?
A good dude will almost never stay; not if he is clear on how he wants to live.

So, you think you on the right track? Cuz you 21 and over you think you got it all figured out?
Ladies, FINDING THAT GOOD DUDE SHOULD NOT BE A CONCERN; USE THAT ENERGY TO LEARN WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT?

Cover your body…God asks that ladies protect their modesty; this can be done while still lookin’ fly.
Check your attitude; speak and behave with integrity…two simple and wise rules to live by.

Aint nothin’ in the clubs and drinking aint cute…there are other ways to enjoy your click; smarter ways to have ‘fun’!
Begin to focus on things that will benefit you in the future; 21 today, 30 tomorrow…time waits for no one!

Get YOU in order, and because you attract who you are that good dude will find you; if not, that’s okay cuz YOU will be ‘good’ no matter what!
So, to sum things up if you want this thing in life called happiness, then GET IT TOGETHER and stop walking through life with your eyes wide shut.

Tomaro M. Pilgrim, MS

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